When parents have different ideas about what kind of education their children receive, it can be a considerable source of conflict. Debates between public vs. private school, a religious-based school vs. homeschooling or whether to send a gifted child to a specialized school are just a few examples.
If children have special needs, there can be even more conflict about their education. Further, parents who have different opinions about what kind of higher education they want their child to pursue may disagree strongly about their elementary and secondary education.
If parents separate or divorce, these disagreements about a child’s education can be exacerbated. Sometimes a parent who previously had no strong opinion will reject the other parent’s wishes out of spite or revenge – without considering what’s really in their child’s best interests.
What it means to share legal custody
When parents determine how they will share custody of a child, they need to determine both physical and legal custody. Physical custody refers to how a child divides their time between parents. Legal custody refers to who has the authority to make crucial decisions for their child regarding things like education, as well as medical care and religious training.
Most people who share physical custody of a child after divorce find it practical to share legal custody, which means they both have a say in these critical aspects of their child’s life, and one can’t make an important decision (with the exception of things like medical emergencies) without getting approval from the other.
If they disagree strongly about something, like what school their child should attend, they have to find a way to work it out. It’s generally best to settle these matters during the divorce process.
Sometimes, however, they don’t present themselves until later. In those cases, mediation can often help co-parents work through an area of disagreement to arrive at the solution that’s best for their child. That can then be codified in the parenting plan, and any necessary changes to custody and support orders can be made. Having separate legal representation can help parents work toward a resolution that’s in their child’s best interest and protect their own parental rights.
