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What do my children need from me during divorce?

On Behalf of | Jun 8, 2021 | Divorce |

Divorce is difficult for adults, but often it is children who suffer the most. Particularly if your child is young, he or she may not know what is going on around him or her. If your child is older, he or she may have very turbulent emotions surrounding the divorce process.

There is no one right way to help your children through a divorce. However, there are certain things you should keep in mind throughout the process. According to Helpguide, you should stay actively involved with your child’s life and work to withhold negative comments about your ex to your child.

Staying involved

While it is likely that talking about divorce with your child is discomfiting at worst and awkward at best, it is important to meet the situation head-on. Continue to call, email, text and your child to stay in touch and let them know that you are thinking about them, particularly if you are not living with them at the moment.

When you are with your child, be supportive. You should also be supportive of your child spending time with the other parent, provided that the other parent is not abusive or an addict. Doing otherwise may make the child feel as though they need to love one parent more than the other.

Withholding negative comments

It is highly likely that you do have negative feelings about your ex-spouse to a certain degree. After all, you are getting divorced. These feelings are natural, but it is important to withhold them from your child. Remember that your child depends on you and your ex to help. Talking poorly about your ex may make the child feel as though you have similar negative feelings about them.

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